Patience

After putting in eleven and a half hours at work today I came home to reflect on one of my favorite chapter from the Bible, 1Cor. 13. I knew that all day long, besides being exhausted from working with children mainly 3 year-olds all day, that I could feel my patience growing short by the time it was to take on my own classroom of school agers at the end of the day. I gave my aide a heads up this afternoon that there is a chance that if all 26 of them were rowdy that I would probably get to be pretty grumpy by around 5pm. (lack of sleep will do that to a person)
Patience is something that I have tried to gain and work with knowing that it is very important in the field of special education when I start teaching. 1Cor.Chapter 13 says that “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it dos not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects always trust, always hopes, always perseveres.” I hear this verse almost every time I am at a wedding, but I’m not getting married and I’m not in love so I’m applying this to something other than love for a significant other. I am using this verse to reflect on my children that I see day in and day out. I take on the task and daily obligation of watching children grow and being apart of how they are molded. (I’m always nervous that I’m going to mess them up) It is a big responsibility in my eyes to be apart of the future of a small child. I had a lot of time to reflect this weekend in the amount of time I spent in my car traveling from Okoboji to my parents, back to my own apartment. (it wasn’t all singing out loud to the music, as people stared as I past them) I actually focused a lot of that time praying to God and asking him for guidance in my own future, asking for patience and strength to deal with daily problems and questions that are unanswered in my life.
I had such an awesome time at RUSH being able to worship the Lord our God with so many others. We focused on Jeremiah and his struggles being a prophet of God. I look at Jeremiah and I look how my life is affected by the struggles or problems in my life and how they compare to that of Jeremiah himself. In Jeremiah chapter 18:1-10 these verses talk about the potter and clay. I sat for a while one day in reflection of these verses molding clay in my hands. I realized that I don’t always look at the big picture. I don’t always realize how everything around me molds me into the person I am and the person that I should become. I look at how my actions and how they reflect on people around me and the children I work with daily. How am I affecting how people are molded through my own choices in life? Jeremiah 18:12 “We will continue with our own plans; each of us will follow the stubbornness of his evil heart.” We are all stubborn in our own way, sometimes our evil ways are harder to change than others, and it is hard to think that we are not alone during times of change that God is with us always, because some times we can just feel completely alone. Philip Yancey once said “When we have nothing else to lean on, not even ourselves, He is still here.” To me that is the most difficult challenge, not focusing on fixing all of my problems by myself, but put my trust in Christ Jesus fully and completely. I know that the Lord is always with me and all around me he gives me strength to be patient and loving through his grace alone are we all save.
Sorry if when I write it is normally pretty random thoughts all jumbled together.

God Bless,
Kristy