Another grandparent gone

Last Friday I showed up at my grandfathers home to find him hunched over in his bed, oxygen tube falling out of his nose, unable to really speak or move.  I didn't expect that. I knew he was sick, but didn't want to see him like this. Pale doesn't begin to describe his color of skin, out of it doesn't describe his behavior. Zombie....maybe, a man always full of spirit was wanting to die. He had given up. 17% of his heart working, but that isn't what killed him. He staved himself and suffered from dehydration in the end which was July 25th. Cremation means the family will wait for services. His children were around him in the end, as we were all making a trip back to celebrate class reunions in town and my grand parents 60th anniversary party.

Memories that pop into my head. He had an office in my grandmas store where he did reality. I spent lots of time there. He also went to the meal sight when I was  4 or 5 and I went often with him. He was always in the same seat at church on Sunday morning. He would say good morning with a tight firm hug or grip on the arm. He loved picking up golf balls at the golf course....everyone made fun of him for it. He loved collecting all of them.  He use to attend every sporting event he could, standing on the fence line watching raider football. I found an old video of him driving his Oliver tractor in a homecoming parade. I think he loved that so many of us graduated from the same school as him! Several of us graduated from ISU too, just like him.

RIP grandpa your birthday is. Friday and we will celebrate the life you had.  Strong faith, helpful friend, supporting family member.

To have baby or not to have a baby that is the question.

To the doctor I go to see if it is possible to have another child.  I love children, I love my son to the moon and back, but I dont know about having another one! Can I do the late nights, no sleep, crying all day and night from not only my child but those of the children I watch all day? Can we afford it?  What if we have a girl? Then they are going to be dressed in a lot of boy clothes! I am not good at doing hair, my husband would try the vacuum cleaner pony tail.  If it doesn't happen in the next couple of months then that would be it for me and having another baby....am I ok with that?


Ahhhhhh!

The days of potty training!

Since the years of not writing on here much in my life has changed. After being married for years and trying to have a child....we were blessed by God to have a son. Now at 20 months old! Life has changed, priorities different. I worked at a great school district, but resigned to be a stay at home mom and do child care from my home! Wow! What a change this was. Who doesn't  love getting up in the morning, keeping on Jammies or throwing on sweats!  Now for my next struggle the potty training. We our on day one of trying.....
Plan: pull ups, going every 20 to 30 min., seat on big potty, M&Ms.
So far it is nap time and he told me he pooped after he went, no success yet. I have read, sought advice online....but am going to do my own thing. Here goes nothing! Today I felt defeated. He has the sitting, wiping, and washing hands down. He has been watching us for months always wanting to sit in the bathroom with us until we are done with our deed. Yesterday he tools me poop and he went. That was a picture I texted to my husband.
I pray for strength to make it through this phase!