I’m a little nervous about our MSEP review coming up in just two week….that means a lot of people walking through the school and into my classroom watching me and my students…checking out everything… I have to go back to writing lesson plans full out like in college…(I haven’t done one since student teaching I hope it is like riding a bike!) I am going to be spending the weekend getting ready for it and catching up on everything I can’t get done during the week. They are people from the state…mucho importante and I don’t have my license to teach in Missouri yet…it is in process>>> Oh the nerves<<< The first 2days back weren’t bad my students pulled out some great reports about racism and they managed to get wonderful water cycle projects after their long break. However…the boy girl I’m going out with her I don’t like him…(stuff I hate to hear) has been going on since Monday in full swing.
I have a student who is using self-mutilation because he/she is bored. I saw it today. I didn’t know what to tell him that wouldn’t sound like a sermon. I tried to get across that it can lead to death and why it is important to find other ways to express himself…like instead of writing his name on his/her leg he could draw all over it. It reminded me of high school ( if you haven’t read previous posts…I think I have written about it) I use to cut myself …not deep I don’t have any scars now…I cut myself shaving the other day…and it brought back memories of what I use to do to myself…and now this! I feel like I accomplished something by getting through all of it on my own (my faith helped me out…GOD) I didn’t do it because of boredom…I didn’t it out of anger, pain, selfishness I guess. I did the drawing thing to help me get past it…I wore long selves all the time and I look back and am kind of ashamed of what I did, but I’m getting past the shamefulness and moving on to why I did it and how I’m a stronger person for making it out without too much fuss or trouble. I learned not to judge those who did it, but learn to find out the reasons why. I claim that cutting is like a drug or alcohol.. it is hard to stop it is addicting much like chocolate cake…you know you shouldn’t eat it because it isn’t good for your body…cutting is the same way…but at the time it felt good. Well there is me spilling my guts. I’m off to bed. Dream Sweet
Be kind…I love comments…but don’t look at me with judging eyes and think of me a freak…I was 15, the over achiever, over active, loner, that was feeling a lot of pain and anger. High school was the time that I wasn’t home, wasn’t out going to parties…I was out doing things all the time for school, work, the community..4-H this 4-H that, I missed out on so much because I did too much. I loved being busy most of the time, but felt pressure from everyone that I had to be perfect had to please them and do everything. That isn’t any way to live and I figured it out after I started taking out my pain and the pain I felt I was causing and others. I made that pain into a physical reminder. I am grown, matured, and have been inspired to get through my pain in other ways. I really want to help this student….but I’m not sure what I can say (I don’t think I’m going to tell them my story…not appropriate) I haven’t even told the parent because I couldn’t get a hold of them…grrrr any ideas on how to deal with this…?
Ok now I'm off to bed...a repeat of Dirt is on...no fun watching it twice in a row. Night
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Thank you for the idea on the measuring stick. One of my co-teachers suggested a similar idea, and I think we're going to try to go for it. It seems that the biggest problem we're running into is that neither of us are applying consequences as clearly and consistently as we should be. Of course, that's tough when we seem to have so many different individual behavior plans that consistent consequences don't seem to exist.
In return, some advice on your student situation (and don't worry. You won't see me judge. There is much that I often feel ashamed about too.) Were it a bigger district, I'd suggest pulling in counselors/social worker/etc. As it is, I think you're the one who might need to wear all those hats. Depending on her interests, see if you can provide her a different outlet (art, writing, even songwriting or something). Definitely speak to the parents, even if that breaks the trust a little bit. You're more children's lit-savvy than I am, but I'm sure there's some great books that deal with the subject too. If I think of anything else, I'll try to let you know.
Post a Comment