5 Years of Remembering

5 years ago today my grandfather passed away. I sit here in my living room and it feels like it was yesterday…911 was called at 2:08pm they said my grandfather suffered from a heart attack. He was dead when the ambulance arrived. My grandma tried to save him. I remember being at work after a long day as a freshman in college. My parents were suppose to meet me in Clarinda for dinner something we hadn’t done since we were all so busy. We had planned it all week. I was outside on the playground with some 3 year olds when my boss Shirly came out and said I was to go to Corning as soon as I could. I knew right then something was wrong, but didn’t know what. So many things flashed in my mind. I ran and got my stuff and started driving. It is a 40min drive to Corning from work and the whole time I just kept trying to get a hold of my parents and anybody else I could. I finally got a hold of my sister as I hit hwy 34. By that time the tears were steaming down my cheeks. My sister didn’t know what was going on but would keep calling to find out. 5min later she called and told me the news. I had just reached corning and stopped at my other grandmother’s store to collect myself, because of so many tears and shaking so hard I couldn’t drive.
I had seen him the day before and he was fine, he looked so good. He had just got back from being in the hospital with some blood infection and pneumonia. I was going to be seeing him that evening before a game. ( I was coaching at the time) He had just come back from a little vacation with my grandma at the clay county fair in spencer. Since 9/11 he had been stressed and worried about things. I feel that my grandmothers thinks it may have been too much for his heart. I never thought his heart would go, I always thought it would be his lungs (one lung and didn’t quit smoking until about 6months before his death)
I remember rushing to hold my grandmother. His face looked like he hadn’t shaved in days. His skin was blue and purple tent. I couldn’t stay at the hospital. I left soon after and went to the church and cried for what felt like eternity on the altar.
I made it back before they took his body away. I touched his right hand and left the room so my great grandmother could spend a minute alone. She out lived both her children and her husband.
I had never cried so much.
I remember staying at my grandma’s that night, she slept in his bed and cried all night. I don’t remember going to class that next day or work. I went to SYAP at the high school I coached for and ended up in tears while Josh held me up and gave me a tight embrace.
My grandpa and I were really close, we were sooooo much alike. We are very rational thinkers, most often like to eat the same food…like bacon. He stood me and listened to me. I saw him almost every day. When I was born they moved to Colorado to live with us and then came back to Iowa with us. I miss him and it is hard to know that he never got to meet his great grandson or to see any of his grandchildren get married.
Here is the end of my little saga of remembrance.
“ To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O Lord.” Psalm 25: 1,2